1.)

(A title panel - the whole comic is in the format of a Sunday edition of a daily comic, but in black and white with splashes
   of teal. We see an issue title in a bible-ish font, hanging in the clouds above two angels who appear to be space aliens.)

GREY ACTIONY TEXT: REAL ADVENTURES^TM IN

TEAL DRIPPY TEXT:  ORGAN REMOVAL

SMALLER TEXT:  FEATURING

TEAL ISSUE TITLE:  PROOF THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE

ALIEN ANGEL ONE:  The concept of this comic made sense at the time!

ALIEN ANGEL TWO:  Don't fuck with me, bro

2.)

(We see Kelly in bed from behind, the hospital room dark while Sleepytime
   Arts TV shows him images of skinny lady legs and bulgy dude bulges.)

ANNOYING MACHINES: FSSSH GASHUNK!

3.)

(Now we see his face as he watches, eyes wet and needing sleep.
   Discomfort personified looks his usual uncomfortable self.)

IV TUBE:  MOVED A SCOOCH!

4.)

  (Kelly looks bonked out in aggravation and shock as the IV stand starts
EEPing loudly again. No sleep will be had and it makes Discomfort smile.)

ANNOYING MACHINES: EEP EEP EEP

5.)

(The next day Kelly is annoyed with Christopher and a nurse is poking
   his head in to make an announcement. Discomfort is ever present.)

INTERTITLE:  IN THE MORNING ...

NURSE:  Your surgery is delayed, dude.

CHRISTOPHER:  This place is creepin' me out, man.

KELLY:  Aw, shucks.

ANNOYING MACHINES: EEP EEP EEP FSSH GASHUNK

6.)

(Shortly thereafter Christopher has gone swirly eyed and is acting weird,
    Kelly is annoyed and Discomfort is pleased to answer his question.)

CHRISTOPHER:  Yeap    Nothin' to worry 'bout    Just gonna pull yr guts out    ♪ A wave of mutilation ♬

KELLY:  WTF is wrong with him?

DISCOMFORT:  Hospital madness

7.)

(The nurse has returned, Christopher is but a tongue-lolling cartoon of his already cartoony self.)

CHRISTOPHER:  *BLOOD*

NURSE:  OK, Surgery time, bro!

ANNOYING MACHINES: GASHUNK FSSH

KELLY:  I'm ready.

8.)

(Two aliens stand before a night sky with three descending UFOs.)

TOP INTERTITLE:  PERIOD OF MISSING TIME!

TEXT IN NIGHT SKY:  Congratulations...

BOTTOM INTERTITLE:  Now you know from firsthand experience what it is like to not exist! Proof of annihilation of the soul!

9.)

(Kelly has awakened, looking horribly ill and scared. A nurse tries to help.
 Chronic Pain has returned, replacing Discomfort as Kelly's companion.)

KELLY:  HELP ME    SOMEBODY PLEASE    I CAN'T BREATHE

DIFFERENT NURSE:  How would you rate this pain, 1 to 10?

KELLY:  Uhh... 9.

DIFFERENT NURSE:  Yikes, your 10 must suck.

CHRONIC PAIN:  I'm back, baby!